Sometimes things break 🫣. Sometimes it's a relationship 💔. Sometimes it's a bone! 🦴Sometimes it's a fish habitat. But Time, the right Team, the right Tools 🔨, and hard work can heal a lot of hurt.
"We break things all the time. It's called life. If you don't break, you don't live." - L.J. Shen

"Do you think we are going to have to amputate?" says the owner. "That's a really bad fracture. And my friend's dog had to have his leg amputated after he fell out of the truck."
"We fix fractures here. We don't amputate them," says one of our surgeons.
"So you think 🤔 you can fix it?" says the owner. "And will he ever bird hunt again?"
"Yes and Yes," says the our surgeon. 👍👍
I think I've heard this conversation over 100 times now, and I can't help but laugh every time it comes up 🤣. If you ask our surgeons, "can you fix that?" --> that there be fighting words. And all it does is get them amped up to do the best fracture repair you'll ever see in your life.
The more I hang out with them, the more I realize that most things that are broken can be fixed. And some broken things are worth fighting for.
Speaking of fighting words... 👊🤬
An actual text string between me and my boyfriend....
"Learning to love is hard and we pay dearly for it. It takes hard work and a long apprenticeship, for it is not just a moment that we must learn to love, but forever. " - Fyodor Dostoevsky

For this summer/guiding season, we were a bit broken. Or maybe it was just me? I was SO flipping frustrated. I think we had a version of this text message chain at least 10 times. All ending with me wanting to bop him over the head with a frying pan. 🙄ARGHHHHHH!!!!!!
So many times, I was like F*** this shit. I'm so tired of it. I'm walking away.
And then I'd wake up and be like, but, I really love him 🥰. He is worth fighting for. My life is a million times better with him in it. So I did what every girl does when she's frustrated about her boyfriend. I go vent to my friends.
The great thing about having friends who are surgeons is that once they are scrubbed into surgery they are a captive audience. You can talk to them as much as you want, and they can't run away. 🤣
Sometimes friends tell you what you need to hear, but NOT what you want to hear.
"How is your boyfriend?" says one of the surgeons as he's closing a fracture repair.
"He's driving me crazy right now. All he does is work. And he doesn't come home on time." I said. "I feel like if he liked me he'd come home on time."
"It's not that simple," said the surgeon. "He's running a business and on top of that you never can predict when I guy gets off the river from fishing."
WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY!!!!????? If I hear one more man say he doesn't know when he's going to get home from fishing, I think I might explode! That there be fighting words!!!!!!
"Have you ever thought about that maybe when he is stuck at work, he actually does really miss you. Maybe you could bring him dinner when he is busy," says another surgeon.
WHAT!!!??? Seriously, you guys are killing me!
I quickly realized that I was so focused on winning the argument with my boyfriend that I had failed to focus on the real issue -- understanding him. I wasn't putting myself in his shoes and trying to understand. I was just feeling hurt, mad and pissed off.
I do not like that man, I must get to know him better. - Abraham Lincoln
If you have the right tool you can fix anything.

Anesthesiologists and surgeons don't have much in common. Surgeons cause pain. I like to prevent it. They LOVE sawing bones. I don't even know how to properly use a butter knife. But the one thing we have in common is we are both fairly impatient doctors who want to fix problems as soon as we see them. They see a fracture - they want to fix it NOW! I see an abnormal rhythm on and EKG -- I want to fix it right NOW!
But not all problems can be, or need to be, or should be, fixed instantaneously. Sometimes Time can be your friend. It gives you opportunities to think and reach for other tools. Here are some tools I've found helpful in having hard conversations:
The Obstacle is the Way (The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph) is a really cool book by Ryan Holiday. Sometimes the hard things in life are the ones worth fighting for.
You don't have to try to fix things alone. Humans are social creatures. We need communities, teams, friends AND therapists. Talking it out can solve a lot of problems.
My therapists (who happen to be the best surgeons int he world) putting in a new hip into a pug. My therapist is cooler than yours.
Supercommunicators is an awesome book. It will help you communicate better at work and at home. #emotionalintelligence
Ok! That's it. Now I need to go bring my boyfriend dinner, because he is going to have to work late tonight ❤️.

I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I'm with you. - Roy Croft
Stay wild and free! XOXO,
Winston & Ashley
P.S. Sometimes you just have to blow SH** up to fix it!!!
July 30, 2024 --> Bravo to Trout Unlimited and the US Forest Service for blowing up the McKinley Lake Dam in partnership with the City of Missoula. This helps restore natural conditions for fish at the site. 🐟

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